Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I'm a 28-year-old guy who has never been in a relationship, nor can I seem to find someone who wants to be in one with me. Why do I feel like a freak?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Have you ever answered your door in lingerie?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

What are some of your favorite hip hop lyrics?

I can read

I don’t buy bullshit

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Will my parents go to hell if I don't wear hijab, they tried to convince me and they provided it to me but I don't want to wear it?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Can bosses get fired for being too hard on employees?

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

If you could instantly cancel one social norm, what would it be?

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I see through liars

Light Squeezed Out of Darkness in Surprising Quantum Simulation - ScienceAlert

I actually pay taxes

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

EchoStar Soars 49% As Trump Urges FCC To Settle Dispute - Investor's Business Daily

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

PC modding repository Nexus Mods has a new owner - The Verge

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Why do I want to suck cock tonight?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

How do you say "I don't speak Italian yet, but I hope to speak it well one day. It would be a pleasure to learn Italian with you. Would you like to teach me Italian?" in Italian?

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Trump gets back behind raids in immigration whiplash - Axios

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Did Muhammad Ali ask Dundee to cut his gloves off before Eddie Futch stopped the fight in Thrilla in Manila?

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

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I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

What is the most memorable thing that happened in your college days?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I can count

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee